Since my vacation in August, I have been out of whack. Since I got back from my vacation last week, I am super out of whack! I am completely unproductive at work; I just can’t get my head into what I need to do, and I just want to sit and play on the Internet all day. I am soooo burned out by this job; 14 years of pushing papers around and fixing other people’s stupid mistakes all day is culminating into one, big, gigantic SCREAM that I am sure is going to let loose at some extremely inappropriate time. I am grateful to have a job, let me make that perfectly clear. Now, having said that, I just don’t want this particular job anymore. I really want to work from home because for me, it would be just be, well, awesome. No commute (not that driving seven miles to work every day can actually be considered a “commute”; more like an inconvenience at best); I can actually eat my meals at home at a time when I am actually hungry – not just because it is “lunch time” or whatever; I can sleep in a little later; maybe I could actually do something that is fulfilling or creative or both. I really want to get the scoping training done; Sis and I are still working on the financial aspect of that and it’s hard. She and Les sold one of their pick up trucks for $1700 cash – and they weren’t even trying to sell it! – but then Sis’s car broke down and she was crushed to have to use the money to pay for it. But that’s life, isn’t it? You get a windfall just in time for crisis. Sis was really upset that we weren’t able to start taking classes with that money, but I tried to get her to see how great it was that they had the money on hand to fix her car. Otherwise, they would have been up the proverbial creek without the required paddle, or even a boat to float in for that matter. She lives waaaaaaay out yonder where carpooling, etc. is not an option; nor is taking the bus or hitching a ride with a friend. They live way out in the country, and there is no way to get around anywhere if you don’t have a running vehicle; let alone drive 105 miles one way to work three days a week. Yes, such is her life. I just want to be able to do computer work from home, work on my novel (yes, yes, be quiet), make my jewelry and greeting cards, and be happy. That’s all!
So, in addition to sitting around daydreaming about all of that while I am supposed to be working, I have not been working on my weight either. As some of you may have noticed, that little gauge at the top of my blog has not moved. If I was honest, it would have moved – back the wrong way unfortunately. I haven’t been reading my book, though I have been talking about it to Sis and my therapist a lot, and I have been meditating on what I have learned so far. I just need to get back into it so that I can keep learning and start applying! My feet and ankles are big, swollen water balloons. They look like someone filled medical exam gloves with water and attached them to where my feet should be; my toes look like little sausages sticking out. Not real flattering. Or comfortable for that matter. This is due to lack of moving my fat butt and not drinking enough water. So I am increasing my water intake during the day and that seems to be helping a little bit; I just need to GET MOVING – preferably manually, not by vehicle. I walked around (stalked) the new Bed, Bath & Beyond that just opened down town yesterday, but it didn’t really help. Stalking kitchen gadgets isn’t the same as strolling down the sidewalk, and it actually just made the swelling worse. If I get brave enough, maybe I will post a picture of my poor swollen little piggies. Maybe if I poke them with a pin, water will spray out (like that episode of Will & Grace with the water bra in the art gallery).